I’m just kidding. Though the news that laser surgery is now less painful is helpful…I have better news.
MPS is back!
I went on hiatus a bit, but I’ve been writing in my head for a while, promise.
I wanted to say something like “Guess who’s back in the mother f-ing house”…
but after scrolling down and seeing my photo in the last entry, I know I really can’t get away with “a big fat blog for your mother f-ing…”…
…
I can’t complete that phrase…I know for a fact that my MOM reads my blog…sooooo…I definitely can’t finish that.
Speaking of readers, though, I received confirmation that MPS has a unique reader…a friend linked to my site on her site and then commented on that friend’s facebook page that she thought MPS was funny…
I want to say, "Redemption is Spelled"…but there is nothing more annoying to my beautiful, intelligent, sweet, caring, loving wife then when I spell ‘redemption’ in all kinds of new (read: dumb) ways.
Back to the subject of my Mom…I wanted to talk about family today.
There’s a HUGE part of my family that resides in this blog. I completely believe that my Dad has a BIG part to do with my blog…with my desire to find recazulous (Word. Coined!) stuff in the world. And well before starting the blog, my family has sent me pictures of all kinds of weird things...more on those later.
Time for a long aside, but it’s been a while since I’ve written so you’re just going to have to oblige…or just scroll through and not read…either way, I’m going to take up more space because I’m PS damn it, and you’re not…but if I could provide a teaser for you…should you read on, you will ask yourself the following question: "Did he really just tell a story about a non-descript white van?"
SPOILER ALERT:
The answer is yes.
So remember how I say that EVERYTHING has a story? Well, I got more proof of that some time ago. There was a non-descript white van (told you so) parked on the street. I hadn’t noticed it before, until one day I was walking my dog…
…and I happened to notice a note left on the windshield of this white van, parallel parked near a small apartment complex. As I approached it, I thought I was going to see a ticket on this person’s windshield and utter the words, “sucks for that guy,” to myself. Turned out it was piece of ruled paper (I didn’t get close enough to evaluate college/wide/legal ruling…my apologies). It was a note facing inward, but written darkly enough to be read: YOU CAN’T STORE YOUR VAN HERE. MOVE IT OR IT WILL BE TOWED. Weird, I thought, seeing as how it was a non-descript white van, one that I hadn’t noticed before, but it really pissed somebody off. A day or two later, there was an official city ticket and notice. Then a couple days after that…no more white van.
It occurs to me that there are no less than 3 versions of this story. Mine (the outside observer), the angry guy who couldn’t stand the non-descript white van near his apartment any longer, and the person who got his van got towed after thinking it was cool to park it there for a couple days.
Some day, I’ll tell you the story about my truck got towed in LA because my wife, then friend, and I failed to read a sign correctly.
Okay, back to the silly picture.
Full Disclosure Time:
I have seen this image many MANY times. Not only have I seen it on my own and with my wife…
This is where I wanted to post a picture of my wife being inappropriate next to the photo you’ll see below…I even blocked out her eyes like I did to my own picture…no go. Oh well.
She’s awesome…and I love her a lot.
Here it is all alone (and by all alone, of course, I mean that all of the inappropriateness lies within the image itself, no one making obscene gestures beside it:
Something tells me that the title of this blog gets whispered in the above situations…
Seriosously, Catholic Church, don’t you think it would be worth it to modify the image a bit? I mean, I get that you have a lot of settlement money to pay out…and I know I’m no publicist…but seems like it would be money well spent to aid in improving your public image.
Here is where I intended to put a stained glass version of this image, but I lost it. Can’t find it in my email, can’t find it on my computer…but it was my whole reason for discussing family in the first place…my dad found it and sent it to me. I’ll post it solo whenever I can locate it.
See you soon!
PS
MPS: Bonus points for anyone who can identify the origin of the title and put it in the comments. I’ll call you out in the next post.
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